The mind is knotted up,
Clear thinking abandoned.
From the inside,
While being swallowed whole.
Like holding a balloon that continues to inflate beyond reason
Pushing you inwards, while tipping you over.
A guilt so strong,
Because the grief is so big
And it’s not yours to mourn.
It easily could have been, though
So comes the fear. A crippling fear.
Familiar places look demonic
Everyday actions seem fatal.
It no longer feels like the solitude you seek,